This is the first post in a series titled, Today’s Reality. The series will chronicle my journey to remission from Chronic Myeloid Leukemia (CML). My outlook as I begin this new phase in my life and blog series is living in the moment in mind, body, and spirit. I am not angry. I refuse to be sad. I am determined to live a long life with love and peace in my heart with the confidence of a better tomorrow filled with joy and humor.
It has been 6 weeks since my diagnosis of leukemia. I have not written in my journal but for a couple of times. I am not sure why except that I know God is here!
Above, is My Prayer Journal Post the day before my diagnosis on 9.25.2020.
At 3:00 a.m. this morning, God tapped me awake. I had a fitful night even after a long prayer and meditation session prior to retiring for the night. I was led to picking up my phone and logging off my personal social media accounts – my personal Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn account.
“Social media needs you, but you do not need it.”
This was God’s instruction. Cancer may have taken residence deep in my body’s bone marrow, but I must not allow the cancer in this country’s politics to invade my mind, nor can I allow the cancer of this world to steal my peace.
I got up and poured a glass of Vernors ginger ale. Sitting in my chair, I opened Scripture and read the three chapters of Ephesians. Afterward I was able to sleep peacefully.
Ephesians – Praying the Scripture
As I grown closer to God, the Father of my Lord Jesus Christ, I will get to know Him better.
“Then (I) will have a deeper insight. (I) will know the confidence that he calls (me) to have and the glorious wealth that God’s people will inherit.” Ephesians 1:18 GW
“God saved (me) through faith as an act of kindness. You had nothing to do with it. Being saved is a gift from God. It is not the result of anything (I’ve) done, so (I cannot) brag about it. God has made (me) what (I am). He has created (me) in Christ Jesus to live (a life) filled with good works that he has prepared for (me) to do.” Ephesians 2:8-10 GW
“(I am) built on the foundation of the apostles and prophets. Christ Jesus himself is the cornerstone. In him all the parts of the building fit together and grow into a holy temple in the Lord. Through him (I am), also, being built in the Spirit together with others into a place where God lives.” Ephesians 2: 20-22 GW
I pray for inner strength and power through His Spirit.
“Then Christ will live in (me) through faith. I also pray that love may be the ground into which (I) sink your roots, and on which (I) have your foundation. This way, with all of God’s people (I) will be able to understand how wide, long, high, and deep his love is. (I) will know Christ’s love, which goes far beyond any knowledge. I am praying this so that (I) may be filled completely with God. Glory belongs to God whose power is at work in (me). By this power He can do infinitely more than (I) can ask or imagine.” Ephesians 3:17-20 GW
My faith commitment
I make a lasting commitment to God to profess my faith, pray without ceasing, and draw near to Him.
God, You have grounded me on a strong reality and truth and in no uncertain terms more so now than ever in these last six weeks. Through the door of my heartbreak with this leukemia diagnosis, You are opening a new way of fellowship with Your Son, Jesus Christ.
These last six weeks, Lord, You have taught me not to collapse at the first grip of this reality. I am at your doorway ready to walk through in Your purpose. I try earnestly not to enter a slow death of self-pity, nor give in to all the so-called Christian sympathy of others who would want to hasten me to this deathbed.
God, I know You can accomplish Your purpose in this broken world through a broken heart. I pray that Your call to intimacy with You will have redemptive work in this world and in me through my broken heart without hindrance nor the stumbling block of today’s reality.
God, I pray that you will not only comfort me but those around me with your healing power. I am not alone in the battle of brokenness in mind, body, and spirit.
May others around me from family, friends, physicians, and strangers see through this new purpose Your light through their own darkness to your presence.
God, even in my daily weakness of chemotherapy and the weight of the world around me strengthen my resolve realizing your promises through reading Your Word, communicating not only my request for forgiveness, my needs but my gratitude, and the ability to serve others if it is only in showing them Your presence in my life.
God lift-up my sorrows to the Cross of Jesus Christ to help me not only see Your promises but to share them with others who are enduring their own pain in mind, body, or spirit.
I give You all the glory and praise God.
Forgive me when I falter in today’s reality. Forgive me when I struggle in my pain, my patience, and in my perseverance in maintaining Your perspective.
You are leading me to victory over today’s reality and may I always hold on to that perspective so that others may see You helping me in my difficulties.
God, You have taught me that my body is a temple that belongs to the Holy Spirit received by You. I know I do not belong to this world. Help me to take care of this body temple, guide my earthly physicians, and hold up all who care and love me. I not only pray for myself but all who reside in this broken and battered world. In Jesus Christ’s name, I pray. Amen
My New Cancer Journey
This series, Today’s Reality will also offer a personal reflection on my website, The Blogging Owl, as well as, a literary perspective on my website, The Owl Poet. I hope you will also follow me on those blogs too!
While I have logged-off of my personal Facebook and Twitter accounts, my blog accounts are still active:
Getting to know God
I have been writing in a journal since I was a young girl. I have kept a prayer journal over the last ten years to draw closer to God. Are you waiting for answers? Draw closer to God.
The Prayer Journals Facebook page provides prayer journal prompts and inspiration. Please join me there or on Twitter @prayerprompts.
God’s Blessings to You,
© 2016-2020 All Rights Reserved